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Almost everyone who is Jewish knows that Kol Nidre is about releasing vows and has participated in the ceremony. Few know the parallel ritual done in small groups before Rosh Hashanah. Traditionally, right before Rosh Hashanah one performs this simple ritual with three friends, each in turn becoming the petitioner, while the other three act as the beit din, the judges in a court. The ritual is a wonderful way to enter the holidays as well as to prepare oneself for what will happen on Yom Kippur.
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Petitioner:My friends,
I ask the three of you to serve as judges in the court
that is empowered to release one from vows.
Will you please serve for me in this capacity? | |
The judges:Yes, we are prepared to hear you. | |
Petitioner:What follows is not intended
to void promises I made to other people
from which only they can release me. | |
In the last year I have from time to time made vows,
sometimes speaking them out loud or had an intention,
a resolution to change something in my actions, behavior and attitude in my mind.
Some of these are in relation to myself, my body, my mind, and my soul.
Some of these deal with the way in which I conduct myself in relation to other people.
And most of all, there are those that deal with my relation to God. | |
Sometimes I took on a practice or a custom
and did it at least three times
and have since either willingly or unwillingly abandoned it
and I know that this, too, has the power of a vow. | |
Many times when I ask for prayers for some people
whether they are prayers for healing, for blessing
or for the repose of souls departed,
in which the formula includes,
“Because I shall contribute to tsedakah”
and I may have forgotten to do that or not been aware,
I ask you to release me from that, too. | |
All these I regret
and I ask you to recognize my regret
and release me from all those vows. | |
The judges:Hearing your regret, we release you.
All is forgiven,
all is released,
and may it be that
in the same way that we here below
release you from these vows and obligations,
so may you be released from the court above from the same. | |
Petitioner:As I stand here
and I am aware of my fickle nature
in matters of vows, promises and resolutions,
I hereby declare that for the coming year,
should I again offer such vows, promises and resolutions,
they should have no effect
and not become binding on me.
At this moment I regret any of these
and do not wish them to be valid. | |
The judges:We have heard your declaration
and consider it licit and legal. | |
May you be blessed with a good year,
inscribed in the book of life and sealed for good. |
Reb Zalman’s Hatarat Nedarim in English first appeared at Reb Dovid Seidenberg’s neohasid.org. We are grateful to Reb Zalman Schachter-Shalomi for contributing his work with a CC BY-SA 3.0 Unported license. Reb Zalman was the first contributor of a copyrighted work, his Siddur Tehillat Hashem Yedaber Pi, with a free-culture license and with the help of the Open Siddur Project.
 Rabbi Dr. Zalman Meshullam Schachter-Shalomi, affectionately known as "Reb Zalman" (28 August 1924 – 3 July 2014) was one of the founders of the Jewish Renewal movement. Born in Żółkiew, Poland (now Ukraine) and raised in Vienna, he was interned in detention camps under the Vichy Regime but managed to flee the Nazi advance, emigrating to the United States in 1941. He was ordained as an Orthodox rabbi in 1947 within the ḤaBaD Hasidic movement while under the leadership of the sixth Lubavitcher Rebbe, Yosef Yitzchok Schneersohn, and served ḤaBaD communities in Massachusetts and Connecticut. He subsequently earned an M.A. in psychology of religion at Boston University, and a doctorate from the Hebrew Union College. He was initially sent out to speak on college campuses by the Lubavitcher Rebbe, but in the early 1960s, after experimenting with "the sacramental value of lysergic acid", the main ingredient in LSD, leadership within ḤaBaD circles cut ties with him. He continued teaching the Torah of Ḥassidut until the end of his life to creative, free and open-minded Jewish thinkers with humility and kindness and established warm ecumenical ties as well. In September 2009, he became the first contributor of a siddur to the Open Siddur Project database of Jewish liturgy and related work. Reb Zalman supported the Open Siddur Project telling its founder, "this is what I've been looking forward to!" and sharing among many additional works of liturgy, an interview he had with Havurah magazine in the early to mid-1980s detailing his vision of " Database Davenen." The Open Siddur Project is proud to be realizing one of Reb Zalman's long held dreams.
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[…] What is Hatarat Nedarim: The Release of Vows? Almost everyone who is Jewish knows that Kol Nidre is about releasing vows and has participated in the ceremony. Few know the parallel ritual done in small groups before Rosh Hashanah. Traditionally, right before Rosh Hashanah one performs this simple ritual with three friends, each in turn becoming the petitioner, while the other three act as the beit din, the judges in a court. The ritual is a wonderful way to enter the holidays as well as to prepare oneself for what will happen on Yom Kippur. Read More… […]
[…] What is Hatarat Nedarim: The Release of Vows? Almost everyone who is Jewish knows that Kol Nidre is about releasing vows and has participated in the ceremony. Few know the parallel ritual done in small groups before Rosh Hashanah. Traditionally, right before Rosh Hashanah one performs this simple ritual with three friends, each in turn becoming the petitioner, while the other three act as the beit din, the judges in a court. The ritual is a wonderful way to enter the holidays as well as to prepare oneself for what will happen on Yom Kippur. More… […]
[…] teacher Reb Zalman — Rabbi Zalman Schachter-Shalomi of blessed memory — wrote a script for releasing ourselves from our promises. The petitioner […]
A legal framework for creating a union must also provide for a legal framework to dissolve that union. The get is the bill of divorce halachicly required to end a marriage of kiddushin, presented by the husband to his wife.
ב_______ בשבת, ב _______ ימים לירח _______, שנת _______ לבריאת עולם למנין שאנו מנין כאן ב_______ מתא דיתבא על נהר _______ ועל מי מעינות, אנא _______ בן _______, העומד היום ב_______ מתא, דיתבא על נהר _______ ועל מי מעינות, צביתי ברעות נפשי בדלא אניסנא, ושבקית ופטרית ותרוכית יתיכי ליכי אנת אנתתי _______ בת _______ העומדת היום ב_______ מתא, דיתבא על נהר _______ ועל מי מעינות, דהוית אנתתי מן קדמת דנא וכדו פטרית ושבקית ותרוכית יתיכי ליכי דיתיהוייין רשאה ושלטאה בנפשיכי למהך להתנסבא לכל גבר דיתיצבייין, ואנש לא ימחא בידיכי מן יומא דנן ולעלם, והרי את מותרת לכל אדם, ודן די יהוי ליכי מנאי ספר תרוכין ואגרת שבוקין וגט פטורין כדת משה וישראל.
____________________עד
____________________עד
On the __________ day of the week, the __________ day of the month of __________ in the year __________ after creation of the world, according to the calendaric calculations that we count here, in the city __________, which is situated on the __________ river, and situated near springs of water, I, __________ the son of __________, who today am present in the city __________, which is situated on the __________ river, and situated near springs of water, willingly consent, being under no duress, to release, discharge, and divorce you [to be] on your own, you, my wife __________, daughter of __________, who are today in the city of __________, which is situated on the __________ river, and situated near springs of water, who has hitherto been my wife. And now I do release, discharge, and divorce you [to be] on your own, so that you are permitted and have authority over yourself to go and marry any man you desire. No person may object against you from this day onward, and you are permitted to every man. This shall be for you from me a bill of dismissal, a letter of release, and a document of absolution, in accordance with the law of Moses and Israel.
(Signature)____________________, witness
(Signature)____________________, witness
How, then, to dissolve a marriage not effectuated by kiddushin? Some legal mechanisms, like vows and oaths, have specific dissolution processes. Others like a brit have no traditional dissolution ceremony or protocol. Additionally, the get is problematic itself because it can only be issued by the husband, and if he refuses to give his wife a get, she will be unable to remarry, becoming an agunah, or chained woman. Various approaches have been considered to circumvent this issue, including clauses embedded in the ketuba and other prenuptial agreements, and some of the egalitarian marriage types addressed on this site were created in part for this reason.
The procedure proposed by CJLS purports to cover any type of non-kiddushin bond, though it specifies the brit on which their marriage constructions are effectuated. (Whether it would dissolve one of the kiddushin marriage types listed here is unclear.) It is based on the get but is written in Hebrew rather than Aramaic.
בְּ_______ בְּשַׁבָּת, _______ לְחֹדֶשׁ _______, שְׁנַת חֲמֵשֶׁת אֲלָפִים וּשְׁבַע מֵאוֹת וְ_______ לַמִּנְיָן שֶׁאָנוּ מוֹנִים כָּאן בְּ_______ בִּמְדִינַת _______ אֲנִי _______, הַמְּכוּנֶה/הַמְּכוּנָה _______, עָמַדְתִּי בְּרָצוֹן חָפְשִׁי, בְּלֹא אוֹנֶס וּבְלֹא דוֹחַק, וּפְטַרְתִּיךָ, _______ הַמְּכוּנֶה ____, שֶׁהָיִיתָ רֵעִי / וּפְטַרְתִּיךְ, _______ הַמְּכוּנָה _______, שֶׁהָיִיתְ רַעיָתִי עָד עַתָּה, מִן הַבְּרִית שֶׁהִתְקַיְּמָה בֵּינֵינוּ. הֲרֵי רְשׁוּת בְּיָדְךָ/בְּיָדֵךְ לִכְרוֹת בְּרִית אֲהוּבִים אַחֶרֶת כִּרְצוֹנֵךָ/כִּרְצוֹנֵךְ. וְזֶה יִהְיֶה לְךָ/לָךְ לְאוֹת הֲפָרַת הַבְּרִית שֶׁהִתְקַיְּמָה בֵּינֵינוּ לְשֶׁעָבַר בְּעֵינַיִךָ/בְּעֵינַיִךְ וּבְעֵינֵי אֱלֹהִים וְאָדָם.
____________________ חתימה
____________________ עד/ה
____________________ עד/ה
On the __________ day of the week, the __________ day of the month of __________ in the year five thousand seven hundred __________, corresponding to the secular date of __________, here in __________ in the country of __________, I, __________ the son/daughter of __________, arose of my own free will, without coercion or pressure, and have released you, __________ the son/daughter of __________, who had been my loving partner until now, from the covenant that had been between us. You are hereby permitted to establish any other such covenant that you desire. This shall be the formal dissolution of the covenant that had existed between us in your eyes, and in the eyes of God and all people.
(Signature)____________________, witness
(Signature)____________________, witness
הִתְקַבֵּל/הִתְקַבְּלִי הֲפָרָה זוֹ. וְזֶה יִהְיֶה לְאוֹת הֲפָרַת הַבְּרִית שֶׁהִתְקַיְּמָה בֵּינֵינוּ לְשֶׁעָבַר בְּעֵינַיִךָ/בְּעֵינַיִךְ וּבְעֵינֵי אֱלֹהִים וְאָדָם.
Here is the document of dissolution. This shall be the formal dissolution of the covenant that had existed between us in your eyes, and in the eyes of God and all people.
Dissolving a marriage effectuated by a vow or oath would seem to require the ritual of hatarat nedarim. How this performance of that process would be different from the one performed before Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur each year, and how a vow of marriage would not be annulled by ordinary performance of this ritual requires further investigation.